5:53am, Wednesday

[huntingdogs]

I'm falling into the irritating trap of associating myself too much with a specific friend, and it's simply because I'm aware of how much they associate themselves with me and it's uncomfortable because I'm trying so hard to stand on my own two feet right now. I don't want to let them borrow my copy of "The Housekeeper and the Professor" even if they're lending me their road code book or if they helped me choose the book or even the fact I think she's more desperate to read it than I am. I don't want her to read my copy--and that's terribly selfish of me. I think it's because it's just because I know I'm going to be annotating it, I know the lines that I specifically enjoy are going to be distinguished and recognised by her and all. I don't like it, and there must be some distance. There has to be distance; not too much, but a good amount to stand on my own two feet and not feel the discomfort of someone being right beside me.